ghgfdh

2008-01-28T19:34:00.001+08:00

~~www.wo-de.livejournal.com~~

http://wo-de.livejournal.com

2008-01-26T17:47:00.000+08:00

I've been staying in my lovely hearth for few consecutive days, I don't really want to but I'm sick. It isn't a bad thing, I gobble almost everything thats in my sight & watch almost every single channel showing on the telly. I'm someone who don't really watch shows but well, boredom .....

okok, my mouth is itching.
gonna go snaffle something anything everything.
bye!
Below are some old photos.
enjoy

2008-01-23T17:04:00.000+08:00

I hate to see guys doing things behind their girlfriend's back yet I only can keep my mouth shut.

& I also hate to see girls have a ever so faithful & great boyfriend yet they took it all for granted.

wtf? It sucks to know things yet I've only got to spit no word.
(edited)

I've change my mind, I gonna declare anything that I'd know now, later or in future.
It definitely will be a muck up. But I don't care.
It's better to be truthful.

It's better to let the person know.
Anyway I'm sick. Gave school a miss today.
bye

2008-01-22T17:40:00.001+08:00

Can I have my name changed?
Jess is ever so common.

lol wtf
okay people start calling my chinese name from this min onwards. thank u

2008-01-21T17:46:00.000+08:00

Webcam-ed with this <3>
Hello I've a hair cut. I cut my hair short.
byee!

2008-01-21T14:50:00.001+08:00

This is Audrey, I like these snap shots. so Cute lo . lol

I prefer hebe with longgg hair there! But seriously she looks pretty in every hair style lah!Without make up here. her nose looook huge!

Anywhat, school was boring today.
Today Guppy & me are so lack of conversation. I don't like the feeling.
how?

bye! Hebe is love.

2008-01-20T23:05:00.000+08:00

This Dick here says I gonna receive many presents from him, yay! =DThis girl here gets better already & still as strong, GREAT!

This Nehneh here MIA gone with her fatty already, _|_
SCHOOL TOMORROW! =D See you baby. I would die in school without you.

Catch up with Carmen just now, yay.

I love this picture & I miss my Da sao-to-be coming to my house.
Isn't it cute? =D
We miss TaiKinLung my bloody brother heaps! Waiting for him to come back!

good day everybody.
Enjoy life!

2008-01-20T12:32:00.000+08:00

Ben's grandma is weak.
She is old & devoid of health vigor.

My ailing grandpa in hongkong is bedridden.
He's fragile & his life is controlling by medicament.

Audrey had an asthma attack.
She was hospitalized, I didn't pick up her call in the morning as was sleeping like a log.
wtf u doing Jes, I hope I had gone to hospital to see her then. sigh

& heard from mom, something's wrong with Dad too.
okay I gonna break down.
bye

(edit)
Joke of my sunny sunday
I saw this at Mitchell's tagboard

o my god: even if u photoshop your face to be like so flawless, ur real face dont look like this. wake up and face the fact. u n jess r frenz ? u don't know how much she backstab u. poor thingzzzz

LOLOL, laugh ur ass off everybody. The clown is acting again.
Stop trying to amuse people, ur trying ever too hard.
=D =D =D u are an idiot!

if you think by doing this can break the friendship between me & Mit,
then too bad. you are not succeeding.

Say I clever or smart or what, I know who is the person laaaah.lol
byebye!

2008-01-18T18:27:00.000+08:00

Dick is super cute,lovely & sweet these days. Curious? He reiterate times that I look beautiful. Well he's not totally refering about me, actually. It's about something more which you gonna brain storm & guess! Only Victoria knows what. & you gonna laugh at it & you wouldn't deny that Dick is really cute.

Okay I have been staring at the computer since I step in my house till now.
My eyes need a rest & look into something greeeeeen.
(edit)
ohoh, anyway. I baked cookies & made sandwitches the previous day.
All of them said it's superb.

Goodbye!

2008-01-16T14:54:00.000+08:00

I saw a shizhu ( whatever you spell that ) being abandon by its owner
I saw the little cute thing being put out of the car & it drove off.

Victoria & I were late for school because we turn around instead of heading school to search for that dog. But surprisingly, we found another dog straying( not that shizhu) ,dank & wounded.
That shizhu is nowhere to be found, i hope some kind soul pick it up & brought home of course take care of it.

I should have bring that dog home. I should have carry it home.
=(

It's no where to be found now but I hope it's doing good.
Fuck, I feeeel so... upset

Because WHY CANT THOSE FUCKING PEOPLE STOP THROWING PETS OUTSIDE JUST LIKE THAT.
They are lifes. ain't toys.

I swear the very next time I saw any stray pets ( exclude cats) lying outside,
I WILL NOT hesitate to bring it home & take care of it.
Anybody wanna disown their pets? CALL ME LAH ! &*#@%*#^%*#

Fuck those heartless people =(

2008-01-15T21:47:00.000+08:00

2008-01-15T18:30:00.000+08:00

I woke up from sleep,I felt sluggish. My legs wobble, my hands quivering.
I know I shouldnt feel that way, but somehow has regressed again.
I knew I shouldnt rake up the poignant past, I know it will make me cry.

But I always had this compelling need & make a pompous confession
I need his attention & his warmth to mollify me when Im dying with this plight.

Yet I know I can't, it's not necessary to let him know either.
I love him very much, but it should be mutual

you are always doing things for him
& Jes,
I think it's time to do something for your self.

Stop living for others.
Live for your self.

2008-01-14T22:54:00.000+08:00

I really think my brother's singing rocks big time. what do you think?

2008-01-14T14:33:00.000+08:00

Hey yo everyone. It's Monday, the initial starts weekly.
& today Dick attends the very first school day this year while he say good-bye to his holidays.

I wonder how it's going there. But I can only sit here & wait for his call.
I wondered would he stuck in the education systems again & drain our relationship,aftermath.

Well on the other hand, his school dismisses pretty late.
yew, sucks

I know I gonna miss him.
But I know his school, his friends & other stuff gonna occupy his time
& left me hanging here. I know that.

sigh think positive jes please.
goodluck to me

2008-01-12T19:24:00.000+08:00

SCHOOL.

2008-01-12T11:36:00.000+08:00

WHAT THE FUCK LAH. I REALLY HATE PEOPLE PROMISE THINGS ALR THEN STOOD ME UP.
DON'T ALWAYS PLEASE ME WITH YOUR SWEET TALKS WHEN U DONT MEAN IT. YOU ARE SUCH AN ASS HOLE YOU KNOW. CAN YOU LOOK AT UR SELF & SEE WHAT THE FUCK U ARE DOING OR NOT.

YOU THINK LIKE THAT FUNNY AH, I UPSET YOU VERY HAPPY ISSIT. U SUCKER
STOP SCOLDING & SHOUTING AT ME LAH, DONT BECAUSE YOU KNOW IM ALWAYS GIVING IN THEN EAT ME LAH. YOU ALSO KNOW I WILL ONLY KEEP QUIET THEN CAN YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP, SCOLD FOR WHAT FUCK?

YOU CAN BECAUSE OF YOUR PARENTS YOUR FRIENDS YOUR WORK UPSET MY PLANS
THEN WHEN HAVE YOU EVER BECAUSE OF FUCKING ME & UPSET OTHER PEOPLE

I AM YOUR PRIORITY MY ASS LAH
STOP BULL SHITTING WITH ME & UPSET ME LAH
*#&$W%#*^%*#%@)#*%&#*%

2008-01-12T11:15:00.000+08:00

The coming up happening festival CNY sounds boring to me.

Well why Jes, you gonna put on new clothes & collecting red packets.

Hey blog, so what? Can't you see I've been staying at home everyday on yearly CNY
Can't you see I've 0 relatives living in Singapore?
Can't you see that my parents work during that period of time?

& THENN, great. I gonna rot my ass & eat my self up in my humble abode.
Can CNY don't come?
or why not just let me sleeeeeeep throughout that time

wake me up when Chinese New year ends.
zz

2008-01-07T18:51:00.001+08:00

I dig Fish&co's big spread that day man right guys?
Anyway Victoria & me did not pay a cent as..
the guys did the job. lol

Body19 or number19 whatever that show call.
It's was okayokay lor.
The Ghost look quite funny though. lol

oh ya, I made a reflect on my self.
After that night when Dick's anger totally blow out. It was scaryyyy.
It wasn't my fault however, it takes 2 hands to clap. So I can't say TOTALLY not my fault.

So like ya, I asked Kenji my queries about how-to-treat-boyfriend-better stuff like that.
Be it this suggestion gonna work or not.
He told me to simmer down,keep cool & don't jump down Dick's throat whenever he flares out.

I've goooooooood temper & patience, I'd dare say.
But it seems not enough to him. =\
how....?

***
Anyway, Victoria asked me this Q today.
''when is the time you will miss Ben the most ah?''
Interesting hor, but seriously
I miss him like every second lor. Even when he's with me, I still do!

2008-01-04T23:05:00.000+08:00

Have you ever love someone so much that it makes you cry?
have you ever miss someone so much that you can't sleep at night?

='(

2008-01-04T21:16:00.000+08:00

School was okay. It's was all about cackling, LOLing & bursting into laughter.
Many things were exceptionally funny today, strange.
Especially The Kian Foong part, it was hilarious right Guppy? lol

I slept my afternoon away, I'm sort of Bed-ridden.
Something is wrong with my body.
okay whatever f it.

Hey baby, I miss you.
I'm feeling so weak & I hope you were here beside me.
You are working tomorrow, again, I hate it.
What to do? Your Bike is your priority, you said it before,
no work= no money for Bike.

Okay jes it's good that you rant it here.
Dick doesn't like me to whine about that.
sigh

bye it sucks.

2008-01-02T15:55:00.000+08:00

School was tedious, filled with doldrums.
Everyone was listless & hardly have eyes open widely.

I'm sure every one was as lethargic as me & none of the mates in class weren't in studying-mood.
Well maybe not totally, majority.
At least like me, zzzz

School is hell.
Can I have 1 more year of holidays please?
Can I have Dick's company every day please?
Can I have fun 24 hours please?

AHHHH, oh my Jes.
2oo8 gonna be bad I guess.

But if lets say God apply condition stating ' Study hard & I'll let your relationship,friendship & everything you do go smoothly'
Okay I don't mind sacrificing my leisure times studying. lol

alright stop thinking rubbish.
start thinking about your future Jes.

I'm so sleepy.
I'm feeling nauseous & sick. I vomited twice yesterday night.
& I miss Dick.

It feels sad, bad, low morale & sucky to miss someone.
Baby can you not make me miss you so much?

Off to slp.
byebye

2008-01-01T14:24:00.000+08:00

Hi, you wanna know about my New Year eve count down?
I think we didn't even do that cus we were late.

But whatever not, Happy 2oo8 New year!
What's so nice to wish anyway.

Isn't it every year is the same?
I mean it's just like today to tomorrow.

annnd wellllll, boring I would say
yet with Dicky's company the day mark with a happier full-stop.

& he agree that it's problematic going out in a huge group
he even say it would be even better if it's only me & Him.

Of course! LOL =x
alright, got to go time is running out
& tomorrow I gonna pull up my socks, tuck in my uniform blouse & head school!
byebye

2007-12-29T19:01:00.000+08:00

This is so cute lah right? Her damn sesame street note book.

Met Victoria for awhile then went back to Audrey & Teeboon slacccck.

This is Teeboon. He was stun by the flash light I think lol look at his face

****

HELLO PEOPLE, JES IS SO BORED. DICK IS WORKING & HE THROW ME AT HOME. HE SAY RAINING CANNOT GO GAI GAI.
BUT JES IS BORED TILL SHE's GOING CRAZY, SHE ALONE AT HOME & TALKED TO COOKIE MONSTERS THE WHOLE DAMN DAY. EVEN SNAKEY JOIN THE CONVERSATION.

I CAN'T TAKE IT ALREADY, I'VE TO TALK TO EDMUND IN MSN CUS I'VE NO CHOICE.
GEORGE IS WITH SHIMIN. WHYYYYYY!!!! I DONT CARE ALR EVEN IF SHE SEE THIS, LOL
HELLO GEORGE AUDREY & I MISS YOU!

OKAY, I GONNA GO MEET AUDREY AND TEEBOON ALR. BYEBYE

2007-12-28T23:29:00.000+08:00

You see what I mean? I'm gonna search the whole Singapore for Cookie Monster Bed-sheet, sweet stuff & everything. Any idea where guys?

CookieMonster is so damn cute man. lol

Hey baby, sorry for making you worried sick & everything. I actually fell asleep after I hang up the phone. so sorry.(victoria) I want smiley toooo!!!!

Hi jes, hi.

2007-12-28T12:45:00.000+08:00

I am Legend, sucks.
Boring like what-the-fuck. Samantha is cute I tell you, German shepherd is my fav breed i tell you too. I gonna own like 1000000 this bitch. The story line is boring. Every bit of this movie sucks. Not worth watching, boo!

2007-12-26T16:20:00.000+08:00

I just met Victoria for some slacking & lunch. Talked & crapped.
Untill our tummy is full of shit & we need to rush home to do big business, no joke. I really mean shitting. HAHA our slacking session always end like that,

Me: eh i want to go home lao sai already, cannot take it, already at the tip of my ass hole.
Victoria : I ALSO!!! HAHA
Me: Okay Lets go man the shit is coming out!

Dick just called me just now, the moment I come out from the toilet.

Me: (shout) AHHHHHH B!!!!!!Si Bennie, FINALLY YOU CALL.

BeneDick: Where the hell are you?! Aiya call your house of course at home lah, HAHA. Don't run around ah, the wet weather gonna make you sick. Good girl stay at home if it's rain k?

Me: Your wish is my command. My hp also with you, if I not at home sure with my Goodfriends one. Just call either one can find me already.

BeneDick: This is good, I shall considered keeping your HP forever.

Me: My friends will Kp you i tell you. HAHA I MISS YOU MAN BLOODY HELL

BeneDick: U know I miss you more, k lah take care of your self, when I've time straight away call you okay?

Me: BYEBYE!

Okay becus nth to blog so random random lah. BYEBYE

2007-12-26T11:30:00.000+08:00

To the friend who back stabbed or whatever it is that you've done.
Sad but sometimes, I think me my self can't be so soft hearted anymore even though you apologized to me AGAIN don't know for what fuck when I know the story behind that you are talking shit about me. lol you are sucha joke, never mind my self to blame to be such a fool & let you play around. I've learnt my lesson, this is the second time I treated you as friend & you treated me as Dog. Everybody told me the story. Maybe like what they say, true colours will reveal no matter how people act. HAHA, yah nevermind man. Upset but accept. You are no shit to me now.
Just a poor thing fucking around & make people thought u are pitiful. Like what u did to me.
Bye crazy slut, u need a mental check up. & really show me a report what the fuck your brain is up to.

Go fuck your self & have some dignity.
Stop disgracing us, girls.
You know what? People hate you, I look down on you.

HAHAHAHA biggest joker in my entire 16 years.
I'm not really piss off with Yuling anymore.( a bit lah)
and I don't care what she thinks about me now.
Bcus she's not fully at fault, we don't know each other, I believe she won't so bo liao talk about me also.
Just some pussy buzzing at her ears & after much POR-ing, or what you call that? PLEASING?

Ya Yuling, be it you think I'm talking crap or not, beware of friends around you too.

She's very very Pathetic. One cunning Cheebye & always push the blames to others. AND a fucking Liar. HAHHA

Never mind lah, blame my-self for making the wrong friend man.
Really wake up and go fuck your self.Cheapy lol

I know after this there you go cook some stories again & make people believes you.
Whatever you gonna do lah, tell u what. People know what you are doing.

& what you were really wrong was buying the god damn present right after you know that I've found out what you told others, to make AMENDS huh. to make me SIDE you huh? Thanks but I'm still thinking whether to throw it away or not, ( although it's my fav babycookie & adorable) but I feel so dirty to keep the things that you've touched. So so Dirty. & how I know whether you got put curse inside? Later the thing bring bad luck I also don't know. wtf lol

No wonder no friends lah, last time need to flirt around in friendster. Need to know people through friendster.

forget it jes, she doesn't understand. Just like singing to a cow. lol

Fuck your self there. From the day I deleted your contact I feel so happier & all the goodluck suddenly come to me ah. you are really a jinx. Fuck off and die lah.
YOU ARE SO BROKEN.
***

okok, anger vent.
I'm alone at home now. & I'm going down to meet Victoria.
My handphone is with Ben, & he command me to stay at home.

byebye

2007-12-26T00:14:00.000+08:00

The ambience was somehow a big bad down this year Christmas eve & Christmas day!
But I wouldn't & not in a grouch for the not-well planned occasion outing with his friends, know what? You gonna laugh at this, our ass stuck at Parklane again! For cry out loud, me & Zhong hence suggested to plan places-to-go a year before those next special occasion outings. lol nah were merely crapping.

What's next? New Year eve count down! I will not pin so much hope, so that won't be in big disappointment. Bcus in sucha diminutive place like Singapore, even special occasions are mundane & hardly could filled with gaiety. In Hongkong? It would be so much different I tell you!

Nevermind, never really mind. Frankly it's your companions that matters. Hyperactive Zhong's & loquacious Pek's zaniness always perks me up, literally. & of course not forgetting, my boyfriend whom has been so sweet to me. (though sometimes he do makes me go haywire.)

Met bloody-long-time-nvr-see Mitchell & was rather glad. Just like the feeling when you met your long-lost friend. Something like that?

I enjoyed talking to Zhong this afternoon & slacking with Zhong, Quek, Son, Dee & Boyfriend was good & seemingly mild. Although it's just for a while & I was mute when they talked about Cars & bike most of the time.

All of them sent me home. okay byebye
It's 12.43 now,Christmas is over.
I'll upload pictures when I've got the picts.

OH YAH, I recieved 4 cookie monster for Xmas Present. LOL
a HUGE one, a medium one, a tiny one. All kind of sizes.
Great, I should tell people what I adore next. =x
Something more costly. lol

2007-12-23T01:26:00.000+08:00

1. Peining accompanied me for awhile & me, alone again. she went to meet her boyfriend.

2. met this damn cute girl here to take thing from her & crap around, with AhBee,Allan etc etc etc.
She & Teeboon really damn funny. lol even when they were quarreling.
3. Thanks for the baby cookie monster. I love it. (=

I need to talk to him, but I receive no calls from him.
He told me he gonna end work at 4am, so I gonna wait for his call.
I wanted to talk to him so much the whole day, where was he?
Aiya every time like that, he's always not there whenever I need him.

too bad lah jes. bye

2007-12-17T23:36:00.000+08:00

Was it rather crazy to go to Vivo city in the early morning when all the shops are even not opened yet?
Yes!I woke up when the sun just hung high on the sky to go there with this stupid Huiwen! Oh, thinking about it, it's the first time we went out together.
You must be thinking, what the hell we do at the shopping centre when the hand havent even hit 12?
For your information, we went for SPA! At Sky blabla whatever you call that.
We went through as if a labyrinth to find that place, Phew! Singapore seems big at times, well just being exaggerate to cover the reason that I'm not familiar with that place.lol

I really had fun running around,she was like a barbie doll being pull by the hair dragging around in my hands. HAHA! Wen, u were so devoid of energy! I hope my craziness did lift you up! I had fun & please be more lady & eat PROPERLY. You guys dont know how she dirty the table, like a garbage bin. lol

*
**
***
****
SANTA I WANT THIS FOR CHRISTMAS PLEASEE!!!

I rock his world. BYE

2007-12-12T23:23:00.000+08:00

This picture is that day with Peining, other picture I'm just to lazy to upload. =P
AH-HUH, I found this picture in my folder. Took it few days back, I rot the whole day at home & ate 7 Bananas that day -.-

excited for me to update right?
lol okay here we go.

So like went to Vivo with Victoria & Kevin(Kenji only came for awhile), caught ALVIN & THE CHIPMUNKS which I've said it's a Die-Die-Must-Watch! The flick would lift you up to clouds nine! In one way or another, the chipmunks are way tooo Adorable that you'd just wish you could keep one of them at home! =D Those enrapturing piece of songs that the cutie little chipmunks sang were AWWW~ It's awesome!, REALLY LAH! I mean what I say. Anybody who would say that movie is a lousy one will, err, die on the spot. lol I hope I can say something more fanciful than that, ah nvm. Must watch okay!

Thanks for the greaaat day my beloved Kevin & Victoria, not forgetting! Kenji.HAHA!
*
**
***
****
*****
This is sick. I know but he did this at public ! CAN YOU IMAGINE??! HAHAHA
Okay bye!
AND for more pictures, go www.friendster.com/nylissej cus tooooo many to upload here!
last byebye

2007-12-12T13:05:00.000+08:00

She's never sick of my crazy lame jokes nor actions, & I think she's rather fond of them although she always remained inert or just give me that 'wtf?' faces. You know?
Like this ---> =.=||
HAHAHA!

& She irritated by me rather often for smelling her hair fragrance again & again.
I do pull them sometimes, that's why. LOL
*
**
***
****
*****
******
*******

Just for laughs. lol

I still have some pictures of our selves but I'll upload them next time okokokok?
so Bye! I'm going out

2007-12-10T01:02:00.000+08:00

Audrey gave me a cookie monster shirt.
Peining gave me a lot of preeeetty panties & a bikini.

I think they are so nice man.
thank you so much.

I'll update maybe tomorrow.
I'm tired & dick command me to sleep right now.
he say it's an order so bye.

2007-12-08T20:28:00.000+08:00

HI PEOPLE. HAHA

Enchanted was really a WOO! Splendid! omg I don't mind watching it over & over again. I bet I really won't get of this show =x
Everything about this show was very wah-veli-fairytales-leh but it's what every girl would wish for, like at least me? HAHA . I hope I'd look as dainty as the princess & only knew happiness. & it would really be fantastic if I can sing all I like & all the BIRDS & animals would come! ohh YA! COCKROACHES TOO! lol

The songs were thumbs-up & the princess's mellifluous voice was really, a WOW, captivating. bye!

*****

This is the princess & the prince in enchanted.
HAHA no lah lame. My brother & his girlfriend. I find this picture really sweet hope they wont mind =x
okay bye!

2007-12-07T15:31:00.000+08:00

Lets101 Quizzes - Fun Quizzes

Saw this from Kaizhi's blog so decided to work on it, I'm way too bored anyway.
Find it damn true, give it a try peeps. Bye

2007-12-06T15:25:00.001+08:00

sorry now quite messy lor.
still need time to edit leh.

I need help lah.
lol

***********
Im sucha wet blanket.
I knew it but I just can't help it
bad memory lah Jes

2007-12-05T22:01:00.000+08:00

Tuesday 4th DECEMBER

My day was kickass fun I must say. I'd then realise My buttocks been stuck in tampines kampong for quite a period of time & this is like after so damn loooong I landed my self at Bugis. Taking pictures with this idiot below was totally insane! But but! I enjoyed my day to the fullest! (=

Sunday DECEMBER 2nd

Rushing around & jostling through the crowds got my leg muscles pulling at the end of the day. OKay I'll make it short & sweet. I went down to Expo 2 rounds, at first with my Family & then met up Felicia & ended up there again. I'd the interest to go to that packed place firstly; to get the free cotton candy & secondly, to see my ah dick. Felicia was there to see her DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE too.

I brought my very own blue specs which soon after Felicia get me the brown one which you could see below. Okay I've explained so don't be dubious why I've 2 specs in the picture below. bye!

2007-11-28T12:02:00.000+08:00

I really hate guys who twits, oh no
I should say I hate people who twits.
It's way tooooo annoying NORHXZX. -.-

Me? I gonna accompany Audrey the WHOLE DAY.
We are going sooo many places like Bukit batok, Bugis, Chua chu Kang etc..
Adventurous right? lol

Oh ya, Audrey says she gonna make me a nice skin.
I mean Blogskin.Everyone witnesses & make sure she mark her words okay =x
WAHAHA!

Green-eyed Jes is feeling a little blue.
Well Audrey, Teeboon is really a nice boyfriend lah.
Last long okay!

Euur Teeboon iish reallii Kwute Neiix.Mussh Cheriish WORS. =.=
what the hell! =.=
okok enough of my rubbish. bye!

2007-11-23T23:29:00.000+08:00

oh ya so like hi people who are reading this.
I'm here to update like finally right, blue moon come out, yet? lol

Alright so met up with Victoria in the afternoon & sat our buttocks flat at the voideck. Then met up with Alvin, Audrey & Tee boon at T-mart.
It's crazy, to go out with my monster face like that!
Then nice suggestion Audrey gave & went PRP for cycling, lol
It's was just a hour ride. The dank soil got my feet dirty! =(

Met up with Felicia & saw Vonnie, Yuling & those Bunch of guys. Far-distanced greeting anyway didn't really see who was there.
Talk-walk with Felicia till she met Dee. Aw I missed talking to her.

So Audrey's dad drove us home.
& I don't think Im able to go out these few days,
No not with my face like that , ew! =(

2007-11-23T13:19:00.000+08:00

Eefan with that chipmunk face.

*******************************************************************

... sometimes as the min ticks by the clock
I feel that our love is at the brink of dying in your watch.

I know how to make people happy
but somehow I dont know how to do the same to my self.

sigh
bye

2007-11-20T14:52:00.000+08:00

Updated. lol

2007-11-09T12:47:00.000+08:00

A song that you would listen over & over again.

2007-10-29T13:04:00.000+08:00

Been busy working & I think I've neglected people around me.
It's too long to list out names, & hey beloved ones, fret not, my love is still around.
Bennie has been fetching me home frequently.
And seriously I love his mother's cooking!

Some people say I'm naive, I, my self confessed it as well.
At times I really hope I could put the clock back to the days with you get what you desired & everything goes your way.
But now, as inconspicuous as possible, so that trouble won't come to me.

Cus I ever experienced predicaments which caused me to believe, Lesser friends, lesser problems. Don't you agree with me?
But I just wanna say, I'd never put a mask & act as if I'm someone else, when I cared for a friend, I really mean it. I always mean what I've said.
Yet... sigh

& Yuling, I don't know why did you say that. I don't even know you.
You aren't justified to even say me, or did I owe you a living or something like that?
But well, you are right. I lamented the lose of Ben's love, but I always cry for a reason. I knew Ben likes you, I knew he had feelings for you. I knew that all along although he has been denying initially. But I fought for what I want.
And hey, you know something? I'm totally disgusted by your words.

You don't even know what is happening between us.
You don't even know what had he told me about you.
You don't even know how well we have been all along although we weren't together. rekindled? Not to that extend but very near that perpective.
The problem is, I did not even waste a min of my life talking about you.

Please, I thought you were nice.
But now, I think you are really nothing but a shit-brain.

2007-10-06T23:15:00.000+08:00

Dawdling & singing at Bedok makes my day.

& appreciated Vonnie who came over in a jiffy just to see & sing a song for me.

Met the people ate at Bedok corner & thanks for the ride home.

My dad took half day off today supposingly to keep me accompanied at home just in case I go haywire alone in my humble abode but I went out instead. But I'm touched by what my mother,father & brother has been trying all their best to cheer me up!

Not forgetting Friends who has been there to listen my rantings & stay beside me when I cry. (esp. AUDREY,pao, Daniel, Kevin etc etc ..)

I can't be certain if tomorrow gonna be a downcast but

I can garantee that RIGHT NOW, I'm feeling great!

okok, I need to turn in early. I only slept like 2 within 48hours spent alert.

I reached home at 12pm this afternoon & went out again not long after.

Tired laaaah. goodnight!

still, I just wanna say

I miss him.

2007-10-06T12:38:00.000+08:00

I'm so afraid to step in home, it's like the moment I do so the sad-mode automatically being switched on. So I followed pao to drink, but well, not that I want to go, I'd never liked those places. I Just want a company to spend the long night with me. Because for the past few days, I'm having sleepless night, I can't fall into sleep, even if I do, it only last for a couple of hours & I would wake up crying.
I don't wanna sound so pathetic
nor demoralized.

But seriously, how would you feel to lose something or someone that has been living with you for years & disappear out of a sudden? I know, time will heal. I'm still young & there are still many guys out there. But...

whatever it is. I'll stay strong, although honestly I really don't feel right.
I mean,

God, please take away my heart.I dont want him to live there anymore.

***********************************************
On the other hand, been talking to mother these consecutive days.
& It's true, it's best to talk to your parents for they are experienced & had went through all what we are going through.

She asked me 'I just want to know, for the past few years with Ben, are you happy?'
My answer is No.
She asked me again ' Can you list out all the good-points & short-coming of his? '
I hold on for a few second, & apparently I could list out 1 : 10

Sadly the only good-point he has that is, he's been the worst boyfriend I had but however taught me to be more wonder.

Hey, it's true. I've been the one giving & giving in the relationship.

I ask my mom again ' but why issit so that he could forget so easily or rather out of a sudden?'
Her answer,' Silly, I'm sure he'll never forget. I'm sure those next girlfriend he gonna have down the road would be a comparism to you. Maybe never spoken but definitely will, in the heart.'

At least, she make me heaved a sigh of pride.
Yes, I've done my very best. Just that he did not appreciate though.
Well, although being unappreciated really disheartening but what for?

My mother says, unless you had done things remorseful other than that are okay.
Like no? I'd given my heart & soul, treat him with everything he needs. & I wasn't at all who ruin the relationship,
It was always him

Thanks my mother who kick some sense into my head.
& yea, Like what Kenny told me my world don't revolve around him.
Hey, even my world would spins out of control, even you would met people who gonna screw your day, nevertheless, the choice is always in your hand.

If I say that I gonna be fine right away , I will be lying.
But it's time to stop harping on the tragedy & look at the bright side.
Yes, I still love him but oneday, I know someone gonna replace him.

2007-10-05T13:42:00.000+08:00

I gave my Best that I can,
.... all the efforts went down into drain
I always appear right infront you just if you say you want to see me
.... I'm just wasting my time
I put you as my priority,
.... I was only one of your options
I gave you my heart,
.... you broke it anyway
I waited for you,
.... you were with another girl
you say you cared,
.... why cant you stop pretending?
you say it hurts,
.... tell me who hurts most
you said you need me,
.... was it sexually?

we cried & we said goodbye.
it's over

.................................................... I love you so much.

2007-10-01T19:27:00.000+08:00

Visited the beach the previous day & ended up playing a fool around, we were planned to go there emo or something kind of shit like that. lol

byebye be back after exams.

2007-09-29T15:13:00.000+08:00

You are taking advantage of me.
you are climbing all over me.

You know I'm good,
you are taking me for granted.

眼闭上眼看不看得见过去
看不看得见原来那个你
和幸福的关系
路太弯梦在转
错过的人已不在
以为我能习惯一个人安全感
路太弯爱在转
明知忘记会很难
我一路上跌跌撞撞
却找不回拥抱的形状

2007-09-27T19:18:00.000+08:00

I don't who to trust & who not to,
I don't know whose words are reliable.
I am very dubious about all these shit. Such a pain in the neck
so whose story is true?

Did I trust the wrong person & barking up the wrong tree?
Or issit everybody were just acting.

Both, I cared as a goodfriend.
Wow wow wow.

2007-09-26T17:35:00.000+08:00

Hey, stop pondering whether if I'd enjoy times being with you, or not. If you are.
I'll tell you, I love people who eat breakfast with me! & boy, being with you never fail to brighten up my day.

Oh yes, this is like after donkey years of isolating & finally gonna meet up with Carmen & Ling later at night for dinner. So anticipate!

Ben is cute.
Ben is cute.
Ben is so so cute.
& Ben is love. (=

Hey, my handphone is not with me right now. So try calling my house number or something.

Feli, I hope you are feeling better now. I'll get back to you soon. Wait for my call/sms

By Victoria

2007-09-25T16:02:00.000+08:00

The time slow down since the moment you left,
or rather somewhat the clock is spoilt or something?
Why do the time flies whenever you're with me & yet make everything seems like an eternity whenever you're away?

I know you lied to me many times before,
I know my heart doesn't trust you
I know I'm hurt very very much

But I'll not show any doubt, I told my self I MUST believe your words
I am trying to keep my self occupied so that my imagination won't went wild, the more I think, the more I feel upset. And even though how much I yearn to tell you the way I feel, well sometimes maybe suppressing emotions is better.

a favour, a desire
just don't lie to me anymore like please.

I would rather choose to let you scold me for nothing than to know that you're doing things behind me. ARGHHH

Cheerup. cheerup cheerup lah Jes.

2007-09-24T20:02:00.000+08:00

you took my breath away....

In any case, whatever happened, I mean I think I'm really a very forgiving person.
Yea you know what I mean.

Last but not least, I hope Andy & Felicia isn't quarreling anymore.

Give me some peace, arghh I need to start putting my head down & start mugging.
Hellooooooooooo Jes, nothing matters more than studies.

2007-09-21T23:31:00.000+08:00

I have tons of goodfriends who gave me so much support.
I have a mother aka my best friend who is as crappy as me.
I have a father aka retarded shit who always do stupid action & makes me laugh.
I have a brother & his girlfriend who is so nice to me.
I have many retarded friends who would always keep me accompany.
I have a damn nice neighbour who never fail to be there whenever I make a phone call.
I have a few true friend, at least I have. Who care for me daily no matter what.
& I'm so happy. =)

Thanks Pao who were there & see me crying like an idiot. & please contact me & Audrey soon.

2007-09-21T13:27:00.000+08:00

I don't care which another girl loves you,
I don't care where have you been every night,
I don't care who have you been spending times with,
I don't care what are you lying behind me,

Because
I know she'll never loves you more than I do
& as long as you're happy doing your own stuff, it's really fine if you don't tell me a shit. & I don't give a damn how long you spent times with her, I know our approximately 3 years relationship won't mean nothing to you...

even if you give me a thousand lies,
even if you hurt me a thousand times,
even if you make me cry a thousand times

still, I'll forgive you.
Because.... boy, I love you...

That is the reason why I'm still clinging on,
that is the reason why I gave you so many chances before
that is the reason why... I woke up crying every night..

& I still believe, oneday
you will understand.

我最爱你，你知道的。

2007-09-20T21:31:00.000+08:00

I dread the past few days, have been spending time moping & morale was way damn low. Well, no sweat, but I get a little full realisation of the point that I'm demented & haywire. I would start to laugh & blather right after the minute I cry. Crazy? not bad lah.

In any case, don't worry about me. I haven't reach the verge of commiting suicide for being heartbroken. haha!

I mean, I never want to leave my beloved friends who have been caring for me so much. (=

you know who you are right?

That's from Victoria & it's offcially my best friend.

2007-09-17T10:14:00.000+08:00

Gave school a miss today due to some headaches, I've a heavy brain right now. But I've vow to myself that by all means, I would do some revision later, soon or maybe when the studying `kick` is here. Basically computer isn't my priority anymore, been sick of even touching it yea so don't mention about blogging. By the way, Sunday's morning was a bonus, some thoughtful person bought Hot-cakes & waited for me right at my block downstairs. Pardon me a little greedy,but how I wish that someone would do that every morning! Wow.

Talking out nightly in a row with Jonathan was stress relieving & humouring, more of the latter. we fancy smirking at someone throughout, not very nice to pen down here. Ask me ask me!

Guys are nothing but trouble.
They always have attitude worst than ever &

last of all, guys are so childish.

2007-09-11T16:34:00.001+08:00

oh okay, I've my elbow piercing & the skin is tearing, I kept knocking it against something.
I can feel it, I can see it & oh Ouch.
Pain.

2007-09-10T17:18:00.000+08:00

Did I mention sad? No way, jose. But unfortunately, & not surprisingly that good things don't last. My happy spirit seems to be fading away yet again. I mean really, isn't it true that heartaches are so unbearable? Beyond any doubt, love always make people cry.

Nevertheless, I found my self smiling by means of people who care. Much appreciated.

I spent my 1 week holiday with that 2 particular retards.
& that 48 hours + spending with my dear Victoria was really great.
I mean it when I say, girl I love being you. (=

mommy told me, it's okay to cry....

2007-09-06T22:05:00.000+08:00

Those special ones whom you met are gift from heaven.
I know I'll cherish.

2007-09-01T22:32:00.000+08:00

~~Hyprocrites are shit.~~
Bootlickers are totally crap

well, maybe really that's an ' ability' that god gave man.

It's okay for cajoling friends, but doing these to whom you don't even know or never even seen before or barely talk makes you a sucker.

Gossip is normal, but by telling me all the-bloody-shit about a particular person & then I saw you acting Wah-so-nice infront of that person makes you a loser.
And the moment he/she turns his/her back, there you starts narrating oh-mother-fucker things again.

Unless you mean I'll have to reciprocate you favours.

~~Okay alright whatever anything, I really look down on people like that.=.=~~

Oh yeah Hello.

So like was Jame's Birthday. That's all.

Nvm about that, accepted.

That's friends, that's life.

2007-08-31T22:22:00.000+08:00

I'm sure YOU KNOW HIM...
Wentworth miller - Micheal Scofield in prison break

He's oh-so-damn-it HOT.
BUT KNOW WHAT???????

HE's actually a GAY.
=(

2007-08-31T18:35:00.000+08:00

(sing) Today is special day, today is special day for you & me

We like to say, we like to say happy teeeeacher's day.

Happy teacher's day oh oh oh

Happy teacher's day for you & everyone.

I got up at dawn notwithstanding that school starts at 83o today. Ask me why, for today's teacher's day celebration's sake! No no, I'm not griping about gettin` up so early however, doing something for the class really give me sense of gratification. But on the other hand, the process of frying onion rings, hot-dogs etc got me my entire body greasy! HARD WORK right? Ask Victoria about it.( we cooked together )

.... Mr Kang won the ' most supportive teacher's award which soared my spirit. That was GREAT! Seriously, I think he is the best teacher in Dmn & he is in my heart. (= You go Andrew!(mrkang) I saw a curve on his face when our class was really very organized, and it's the first time so! HAHA good job.

Kenji's flight tonight, he will be on a jaunt to Australia. Hence wouldn't see him during the Sept Holidays.

Bon voyage & take care of your self dude!

2007-08-29T18:20:00.000+08:00

Hello,

past few days (or rather weeks) have been hectic with tests & I've been feeling hippie lately too. Not forgetting Victoria's one-thick-stack of love letter & it's always time well spent with her company. WOO, & I'm anticipating friday as we've planned our inane idea doings, bringing the childish-est bag to school for instance. UH-HUH, anywaaay, she came to my place for making sand-witches & I gave her variety of cutie-kiddy stationeries. She was enthusiastic & she loves it. =P

Oh yes, I met up with Audrey that night for awhile & had a nice catch-up( a bit ).

More meet ups coming up!

2007-08-24T14:34:00.000+08:00

List out your top 5 birthday presents wish for:
1. Happiness
2. perfect boyfriend
3. BMW
4. Long hair
5. a fairy god-mother

Answer the following questions:
1. The person who tag you is? - Mitchell
2. Your relationship with him/her is: - girlfriend
3. Your 5 impressions of him/her:
A) sweet-looking
B) feminine
C) refine
D) amiable
E) crazy over nice clothing

4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you? telling me things about my ex which I didnt know. lol
5. The most memorable words he/she had said to you?too many lah. lol
6. If he/she becomes your lover, you will? See how. lol
7. If he/she becomes your lover, things he/she has to improve on will be? U mean lover means have to really love me faithfully & wholeheartedly.
8. If he/she becomes your enemy, you will? do nothing.( but wont happen anymore )
9. If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be? wont one lah this Q is so irritating.lol
10. The most desire thing you want to do for him/her now is? meet up soon (=
11. Your overall impression of him/her is?personable friend
12. How do you think people around you will feel about you? er, dno lah LOL
13. The character you love of yourself is? -stop being so irritating u mr Question
14. On the contrary, the character you hate of yourself is? -flirtatious.
15. The most ideal person you want to be is? -Hebe
16. For people that care & like you. For people whom I’ve hurt: For people whom I love & treasure: Say something to them.For people that care & like you: Much appreciated ...For people whom I've hurt: sorry lor. lol. . For people whom I love & treasure: I hope you'll never leave
17. Pass this quiz to 10 people that you wish to know how they feel about you.
1. Victoria
2. Lingie
3. Peining
4. Felicia( I bet she wont do cus she's a lazy bum )
5. Vonnie
6. Audrey
7. -
8. -
9. CANNOT THINK LAH
10. mit? i wan to know how she feel about me too.lol

Who is no.6 having relationship with?
[Audrey] Cucumber
Is no.9 a male or female?
[CANNOT THINK LAH] both i think
If no.7 and 10 are together, will it be a good thing?
[- & mit ] then 7 must be Mit's imaginary friend
How bout no.8 and 5?
[- & vonnie] must be crazy lah .lol
What is no.2 studying about?[Lingie] Sec sch?
When was the last time you had a chat with no.3?[Peining]lol 8773275874353478 days ago
What kind of music band does no.8 like?[-]ghost lai de
Does no.1 has any siblings?[Victoria] one brother & two sister
Will you woo no.3?[Peining]you must be joking
How about no.7?[-]now hungry ghost fes, not funny hor.
Is no.4 single?[Felicia]No leh
What is the surname of no.5?[Vonnie] I DONT KNOW.LOL =x
What is the nickname of no.10?[Mitchell]mitmit
What is the hobby of no.4?[Felicia]Sports? used to ?
Do no.5 and 9 get along well?[Vonnie & -]Yah she like to play with ghost -.-
Where is no.2 studying at?[Lingie] Dmn
Talk something casually about no.1?[Victoria]One word, beloved..
Where does no.9 live at?[-] zzzz
What color does no.4 like?[Felicia] ermmm. lol
Are no.5 and 1 best friend?[Victoria & vonnie]no leh
Does no.7 likes no.2?[- & lingie] ermmm. -.-.
How do you get to know no.2?[Lingie]were primary sch then, we get into some ' gang fight' lol were against each other but we met each other again in sec sch. lol
Does no.1 have any pets?[Victoria] no
Is no.7 the sexiest person in the world?[-]............

2007-08-19T21:57:00.000+08:00

Hey there,
I'll come back when my blogging-mode is on.
sorry! be back soooon~

Oh yah, My cousin & Auntie went back to Hongkong already.

Sometimes I really think I'm sucha sucker.
I pretend that I don't care a jot when actually deep down in my heart I'm concern about the person heaps or I'm very much bothered when that particular person drift away from me, I would just feign ignorance, just like now.

I've no idea why I'm like that, usually I would just .. give all my effort and hold that person back into my life?

Maybe I'm mere immune & tired of that, it should not always have to be me.
& I really believe, people who are true & really love me

they will always stay

2007-08-14T22:50:00.000+08:00

Time went by in a haze, it's already August & soon meet an end for 2oo7.
Hectic days or not, everyday I'm preoccupied with stuff & thoughts..
but everytime I recall, for the past few months were nothing but empty.
I guess I'm just doing nothing but dallying.

I really wonder what the hell I'm up to, I feel so bothered. But I'm oblivious to people & things happening around anymore.
Nothing really affects my emotion, I'm so immune to love, friendship problems..
These stuff have hurt me enough.

By the way, Carmen sent me a message which lead me into a dilemma.
Hesistated for quite a while to reply or not, however my nimble fingers seemed to be stoned. If you were reading this, thanks for your concern.
Perhaps I should have reply, but on the contrary my senses were stopping me to do so. It keeps me ruminating on the words you said that day & yes, it really hurts.
Our friendship seemed to be jeopardised so much.

Is Life meant to be like this to never go your way?

I've been missing my halcyon days heaps...
I need to find back the reason for me to be happy.

2007-08-12T15:08:00.001+08:00

You are making me so feel like a spare tyre, a substitute .
But let me TELL YOU I AM NOT gonna let you fool me.
aRgHhh, F you.

now I realise, I was just a replacement all along.

2007-08-12T11:46:00.000+08:00

I met up with 4-years-never-see primary school friend, Beaumont & Yujun yesterday at Tampines mall, I felt quite bad because I was with them for only like 15 mins & I went to look for my aunt,brother & cousins. lol really realise how time flies. They said I'm SHORT! like bloody-hell, I'm already so-called quite tall compare to an average height of a girl okay.

Met up with Fook Cai at night for dinner & we talked about people & life. Sound so, er? HAHA.

Fook Cai has been a good friend to me all along, he never fails to lend me his listening ear although beside listening, he couldn't give me any advise to heed but he's always there to support me. He gave me strength when he said ' let go of people who can't see your worth, what for clinging on people who only make your life screwed up? I've waited for a girl for 2 years & thinking back, I was just wasting my time & money on her. Now I found my new girl & Im happy. Jes, I can see you have did your best,it's not your fault it's just that people take you for granted.You can do it too ,you'll always have my back'

& yea,I'd just lost a good friend recently, & there the fact proves that after old ones left, new ones will come.
Was feeling rather low yesterday night when this cheeky girl Felicia started a conversation with me, well it's merely a short - talk but it literally lift me up a little. oh oh, thank you so much . & also thanks Kenny for the Long & crappy talk in the phone. I nearly woke my family up for my hardcore laughters caused by him.

I want to watch Disturbia, anyone ? (=

2007-08-08T21:45:00.000+08:00

ti
2 hours in school for national day celebration

Kenji's place was pratically awesome & nobody who had been there would deny with that fact because the surroundings & everything was indeed breath-taking. Yes, I swear! Get to know his neighbour (Kevin), all I could mention is merely a mature-looking fourteen year old guy. And he was exceptionally nice for being there to ease our hungry pangs as his dwelling was right beside the pool.Annd Listen, it's one whole container of biscuits, Hello-panda, snacks & candies. Wait! And you really wouldn't want to know what we did, our perpetual nonsense always leads our brain to astray morally. Haha!

My beloved Victoria & Kenji, (=

Us ! =D

We settled down at Changi village for food hunting. Stingray, sotongs & various of seafood are thumbs up. Seafood is Victoria & my FAVOURITE right girl ?=D Kenji & Kevin headed home first while left with the both of us. Doesn't matter, even if it's just the two of us we could still be able to lift the spirits up. (= Oh yah, we watched the sun-set together & that was incredibly beautiful.

Go take a look at my friendster for more new photos. www.friendster.com/nylissej

It's just too wonderful to have them .

2007-08-06T14:47:00.000+08:00

Yes, I've made my very decision. Seriously have been pondering deep & thinking wise, annnnd you know, time shows the truth of everything & certainly someone's interior. One might be affable initially, but true colours only show up after a longer period of time and then you would realise the compatibily in between. I can't always go with the flow, ' follow your feelings' is a dumb phrase used in certain particular sense. I gonna be smart & do things that are constructive, I won't let my self to be twirl around anyone's fingers.

Don't ask me questions like who am I going to be with. Bcus I'm gonna be with nobody.(only victoria know something about that (: ) Single is not that bad huh? Family, Studies & friends are the only thing I would bother about, for now.

For someone who keeps telling me about me.
you dont have the right to tell me what are my flaws or tell me what-so-ever about moral quandaries. Because you know something? I think I'm always so much better than you. & that's definitely.

2007-08-04T13:34:00.000+08:00

'Alone' was not that bad, although horror movies's always goes the same way. I could predict when the scary parts gonna appear,dauntless, that's when I'm all so ready to shut my ears!=P (horror movies are so dearth of new ideas)

Well okay anyway, I would conclude that the movie have numerous part that will shock the shit out of you. But ironically, I'm freaked out not by those demonic scenes(as I've well prepared- lol). HOWEVERR, the shrilling screams from the woman sitting right on my left hand-side was literally alarming. Bloody-hell! I look down on those ladies who scream in the cinema, VERY. Like hello, your screams are worse than those appalling pictures of the ghost. And it's not your home so please shut the fuck up in the cinema.

Vacancy was a worth watching show too.
If you wanna know whether which show is nice or not,feel free to ask me b`cus I'm so-called a movie marathoner.Ah-ha!

I can't wait for Jay chou's ' 不能说的秘密‘
Hohoho.

2007-07-31T21:48:00.000+08:00

Poor brother~ He's down with fever & the way he grimaced really seems that he is feeling very ill. I went down with his girlfriend & waited for cab with her.
Had some talks with my cousin (biao ge) after that.
oh well, nothing much & I hope he recovers soon!

Ohohyaaaaaah! I've forgot to mention that My grandparents, my 2 cousin ( biao ge & biao di ) & one of my aunt came over to Singapore for a jaunt? NO! Not great at all, heartless one you may say but in fact I would prefer less noise & some peace please. you know, I don't like to gather like so whatever. lol

My little cousin. lol

I'm seeing everything in black or white.

Everything is either right or wrong..

& my black-and-white world turned grey and I could no longer tell right from wrong..

2007-07-28T13:51:00.000+08:00

Simpsons didn't disappoint me, it was indeed a slapstick movie.

The comical parts of movie amused me which send me cackling like an insane, but by the way, it was only then initially. When it comes to the ending part I felt kind of bored, or rather maybe I was just feeling sleepy that's why I nearly dozed off. HA!

So it wasn't the movie's fault, lah.

Wondering why? B`cus he's always there to enlighten me. He will still, do those embarassing & silly stuff even though how reluctantly just to make me laugh my ass off. What is the best of him is, he had never gave me attitude problems. His attitude is impeccable., to me lah =D He always try his BEST to be there to accompany me even if he is full-of schedule. & I know, never will he hurt or make me cry .

Hey, you know something? True friends are more than just call him/her when you have no companion to go out with, more than a companion to-be only when you are rotting. YES, exactly. It's someone whom you confides in & the FIRST thing in your mind no matter where you are or what you are doing.

Some friends only appear when you are in a dilemma or appear out of blue when you broke down? But Frankly speaking, who wouldn't automatically placate somebody who is crying? It's natural, don't you think so? Is it really necessary that SOME friends are only there when you are in unpleasant plight? So when you are enjoying life it's none of their business already lah?

Those people are known as acquaintance.

''Be there for you'' is not only when you are facing an ordeal. It's to be there with you always together doing silly stuff & caring for each other often. Well, this is my perspective.

You can stop continue reading. lol cus I just feel like putting down things I despise.

- When I seemed morose, Please the shit & say, ' EH why you so sian sia?' or ' EH you changed already sia last time you won't like that one' Instead, please ask ' what happened?' for god sake. Like please, if nothing had happened I won't be like that, if you know me, I'm always in gay spirit.

- Don't ever say I'm having moodswings or say that I'm giving you a whole dung of attitude. Trust me, if you've been really nice to me, I seriously will appreciate. So if I happened to give you shit, it's time to reflect on your-self. Because I really got the cheek to say, I've no attitude problem.

- Don't come bull-shit with me bitching about other people saying ' woah, she/he very act one dont go close to her/him.' or ' I dislike him/her, she/he very the ..... & so on' when APPARENTLY she/he is your so-called GOODFRIEND.

-Stop being meddlesome if you are one. I will tell you things if I want to. Caring for someone also have it's limit. Don't be a possessive loser. ( although I know sometimes I'm also like that, lol.)

- NEVER tell me that, '...I'm in a much more suck-er situation than you' without even tried to reassure me & there you go fancy narrating your grandmother old story. Like please, where is your logic? Basically when I'm already in a low spirit, do you think I would want to listen to your shit? Come on leh, when I tell you I'm in such predicament is because firstly,I need a listening ear & secondly,I need some one to cheer me up. Don't you think you would suck my morale if you do that?

okay okay, toe the line. too much to say ! BYE!

2007-07-22T11:40:00.000+08:00

Outing with Eefan, Cousin(biao ge) was remarkable.

But there was a big problem between them to communicate, lol their hand signs were hilarious. Especially when Eefan wanted to ask him 'wanna go urine?' LOL

Bennie & Victoria joined us at Dhoby ghaut, they went to play pool.

Anyway, I know I'm crazy or something,meetin someone who keeps screwing up my days. I'm forgiving mah, so sad.

Was feeling super down, when Victoria's freakiest play pool actions come to the rescue. Hard-core laughters man. HAHA

Anywaaaaay~ after so many bad days, I pamper my self with hot-cakes this morning! YumMmMm~

Yes, I went alone. Ain't that bad actually.. err, I think? lol

Although so much I long to have a companion, but I shall wait for people to be more initiative & ask ME! It can't be always me.

(edited)

So like went swimming yesterday with that pig at friend's condo area.

Let pictures do the talking . BYE!

okay I realise there's really a big difference of her with & without make up. lol

2007-07-17T14:41:00.000+08:00

I'm soooo happy to have Kenji & Victoria around, I mean it from the bottom of my heart =D

... well , sucha a sorrowful day I should say.

Three of us look so unhappy =(

emmooooooooooo~

Victoria & I were sort of in a similar predicament.

I think she can feel how the way I feel.

*** notwithstanding the fact that I'm have super sore-throat,

I grabbed 2 packet of potato chips to school today for breakfast & had finished the whole packet up.

and right now I'm drinking hot chocolate.

I gonna consume all the heaty stuff.

I don't even care if I gonna be sick or not.

I do think that I'm really going haywire.

obstinate, maniac or whatever you called what I'm doing.

lol I don't care. I wanna fall sick,gravely.

2007-07-16T11:38:00.000+08:00

I'd gave school a missed today

thanks to the ultra-headache I'm having which I feel like I'm flying.

Throat on fire & don't know what-the-fuck is wrong with my stomach.

I'm feeling nauseous, I feel like puking my stomach out -.-

& my chest.. lol

jesus christ.

I don't know why, but I keep thinking about you

2007-07-15T20:45:00.000+08:00

It hurts simply becus` I'm so used to your presence already.

I can't deny that I'm not okay if we were to drift apart,

I won't pretend about your existance cus you had became someone important in my life.

.. but if oneday you insist to walk away

it's would be just like taking one of the colour away from the rainbow

it would simply be so incomplete

it may seems to be nothing

`but it do make a difference..

just like you..

to the world you may just be an ordinary person

but to me, you are extraordinary.

don't think that your self is ain't no nothing to me,

cus it may be you.

I'm nt only talkin about love,

I'm also talkin about friends.

2007-07-15T10:09:00.000+08:00

Funny to say, it was a long saturday for me.

It's weekend which I'd always lookin forward to after 5 consecutive day being trapped in the education system.

... yet I wasn't in a state of euphoria these days

sorrows written all over my face

' nevertheless,

takin` neo-prints was the highlight of the day.

Victoria spent the whole afternoon with me untill at night,

I met Carmen & headed Ahmad's Chalet.

Anyway, I slept at 5am+ last night & woke up at 9.

I'm so gonna deprived of sleep

&... the pain in my chest is getting unbearable.

I don't know, I think i gonna die early. lol

Maybe I shall not have come into your life,

maybe I shall not have care a jot

maybe....

I've came.... & I shall go now

Anyone can chase the grey clouds away for me please?

*********************************

Dear diary,

I've been very depressed for the past few days, everything was screwed up.

I've been thinking a lot but I don't really know what I'm thinking. I've been out many times but I don't know what the hell I'm doing. I've been crying at night before I sleep but I don't what the fuck I'm crying for.

I don't know what I've done wrong, but I just feel that I suck in everything little things I do. I just feel that everything I've done is wrong. I feel that I screwed up people's life, & screwed up my own life as well. Am I nothing good at?

Oh yes, the pain in my chest is getting worst & worst. Well it's been so long, but I guess it's just small matter or something. Nah, I don't even bother.

Diary, can you teach me what to do? Everything is not going my way. I want to change life, I dont want life to change me. But I really want to know, am I that sucha sucker?

I really don't mind being a bitch if that pleases anybody.

sigh

2007-07-10T20:42:00.000+08:00

I didn't know it would hurt me this much over these kind of disputation,
it's somewhat just an nonsensible tiff which shouldn't had occure if both of us appease each other & the misunderstood would not have happened. Seriously, we both shouldn't have fly off the handle.

At one moment I was extremely irate, at another moment I feel a knife jabbing my heart without stopping. It was so.... painful. =(

You fitful tantrums thrown on me seemed very unusual to me,
maybe I should have placate my self that, well you are just having common moodswings.

I didn't expect the quibbling to happen till our hoarse shouting was heard.

Although your apology & warmth embrace really did remedy my heartbreaks & stopped me from crying,
but it was really flabbergasting & unexpected.

In any case, I'm really sorry then.
I don't whether there's a need for me to apologise, or not.

But sweetheart, it really hurts...
even now ='(

Somehow true, if you want a rainbow, you gotta put up some rain.

... it leave me pondering,
Hey Jes, I think you are so not good enough.

where have all the good days gone,
who were there when I'm alone

Again Jes, other people are enjoying life out there.
Who bothers about you.

paranoid..

2007-07-09T19:08:00.000+08:00

I'm gonna start saving,
& trying not to squander money away like anyhow
I'm on diet,
& trying not to eat so much cus I know my stomach will never be full.
I'm gonna concentrate on my studies
& trying to be serious when I need to

I'm gonna be happy
& trying not to cry over unworthy stuff

cus' there's people who love me.
& I know there's always someone who appreciate me.

Even though it may just be one out of ten.
One is enough

2007-07-02T23:38:00.001+08:00

Girls usually tend to wish & say, ' oh, well my next boyfriend's gonna be Hot. Tall, charming & rich'
But the very next day, you found out she's with a guy so ordinary, short, average-looking & ain't wealthy.

Well, it's how the chemistry of love occured & it's beyond your control.

I believe the feelings grow b'cus that person can make you happy.
& I believe if you happen to came across some girls with long-term relationships, she won't says that ' oh, I love my boyfriend b'cus he looks so hot. He is so handsome that I don't mind his attitude problem.'

Yes, it's the interior of a person that really matters
that blossom the love between a couple.

Afterall, dashing appearance is just nothing & it couldn't hold anyone's heart
it's the character you have that makes your self a so important role in someone's life.

Cus` everyone is uniquely different.

2007-07-01T11:53:00.000+08:00

The day was full of surprises, one after another.
I've never felt this way before, I so feel like I'm the happiest girl on earth. HAHA

no words can decribe how happy & touched I am, THEY were saying.... JESSIE

NI, We LOVE YOU!

I'd hope I have a better camera phone but so sorry but you gotta strain your eyes & just imagine.`it's not that hard to imagine -` lol

Thanks BALL for the 57 balloons & 27 glow-stick. soo sweet

I felt quite upset cus I can't able to take all the balloons home =(

***********************************************************************

Well, thank you for being there this day.

I still miss eating the seafood spaghetti thing, Golden-shrimp, Strawberry super Soda

everything was yummy! I'm sedated =)

I'm grateful that you were beside me, but the feelings isn't there anymore, there's distance..

you're a changed person....no longer the one I've knew & you really suck, you made me cry on my birthday.... sigh

But anyway, thank you for the presents & surprises guys.

not forgetting those sms/calls wishes. =)

2007-06-29T13:14:00.000+08:00

It's true that without Victoria & Kenji in class, the lessons would very much make me doze off. Fact that Kenji & me are close & sweet, I just knew that I gotta keep a few center-metres away from him maybe? Before his dear girlfriend Tricia feel jealous or something. You know, better not risk, although she says she doesn't mind.

Everyone around me are attached, not entirely but majority?
That's kind of... sad
got Boyfriend means - pei jes lesser. =( !

My birthday is coming.
just on sunday.
=)

2007-06-28T17:29:00.000+08:00

After so long for not touching my books

Kenji,Victoria & I laughed out hard when we found these stupid drawings in my Literature's textbook. HAHAHA

I think I'm so sick in the mind sometimes, really. LOL

2007-06-26T16:14:00.000+08:00

I said ' HELLO' to Dunman secondary again on MONDAY.

I'm sooooooo HAPPY that MR KANG IS STLL OUR FORM TEACHER .

I missed my classroom so much, missed Mr Bernard so much & certainly my lovely classmates & teachers.

So like Victoria is at my house now, while I'm bloggin' this shit. HAHA

We made yummy sandwitches for tomorrow breakfast. So nice of us, we've made an extra one for Mr Kenji Jones. =D

HELLO SCHOOL, WE'RE BACK!

lol

2007-06-24T00:43:00.000+08:00

He said that I'm just some typical slut fuckin' around with guys.

Well, thank you very much.

But I know what I'm doing, it's not what you think.

& your nagative comments are really bad, please, it hurts me.

I know I mean nothing to you

and you don't even care

tears are shed, heart-broken

still, you are in my heart constantly.

I don't know why,you are just so irreplacable.

Anyhow,

thanks Victoria for the balloons

Thank you for trying so hard to cheer me up.

I love you so much =)

I think I need a sunrise, I'm tired of the sunset

sigh...

2007-06-22T10:18:00.000+08:00

Oh jess, you are such a goooood friend. Gotta admit, I am very pleased & impressed with my self. I bought Porridge for poor ailing Pao that day. Well well, it's not the first time.
But anyway, I was delighted when you left a msg in my tagboard telling me you are feeling better. Greaat, please take care of your self.

2. I've been parking my ass at 800+ for the past few nights to accompany Partner after his long & tedious work. Although he always prompted to convey me by his car, but nah, please save the trouble. Thank you for the craps, FOOD, LaoLan-ing, CHOKE-SLAMing & of cos those ultimate dawdling filled with fun & laughters.
But again, the frequent home rides were much appreciated.
I hope you comprehend when I gave you that bashful smile, but you know that right, partner?
I'm someone who are always afraid to trouble people or in another word, SHY.

I do relish those seconds,minutes or hours sitting in the car with comfy.
Fancing listening to the radio which often bring me down by sorrows.
I'm very sorry when I could not help it with my tears, yet you never fail to wipe them away & makes me feel better.

& it would take us such a long time wavering & to bid goodnight.

3. .. to roll over the moment I recieved your call, BALL.
to cackle at my illogical ideas, to mimic like those twits, to tease me at my big stomach, to have your huge prawns balls with one extra Ham ones, to got drenched by the rain, to scream when you nearly slipped & fall,
the 100Km Big walk would not be forgotten to mention,
I was literally exhausted, were you?

I'm always there to be your backer, my dear friends. =)

2007-06-19T00:03:00.000+08:00

Accompanied Pao to have his Lunch at 1-2pm +

& went to meet VICTORIA at around 3pm.

I gave her a surprise.

I told her to meet at the 400+ bubble tea shop, actually I was already outside her house.

So like I hide behind the walls & hug her when I saw her & she freak out ! HAHA

I swear I missed her so much, we didn't meet up for like 3 days man.

& slacking with her is never bored, that's for sure =D

This was what I always show her whenever she keeps telling me she's fat.

Then I recieved a sudden call from Fabian,

he asked me go Katong like straight away & I was like ' huh? What's going on?'

He say he gonna give me a surprise & I would disappoint him if I don't turn up.

So like I met up with Ah Boon & he made a biggest joke of the day.

We took the correct bus but wrong direction, before we board the bus I was dubious & even ask him ' EH you sure or not?'

cus I'm totally noob in like the direction to Katong.

He say ' Yah comfirm'

Untill Kenny called me & I look out the window realising that we're taking the bus heading towards Pasir ris =.=

Enraged, I felt like slapping his face. lol

SO OKAY, that's not all.

Like I'm a noob, I didn't know which f ing stop to alight.

We pass by ' Katong mall' & he say ' Reach liao'

I EVEN ASK HIM' YOU SURE OR NOT? GOT KATONG MALL & KATONG SHOPPING CENTRE DIFFERENT YOU KNOW?'

He answered me, ' COMFIRM'

Alright, guess what. I was a fool to believe him.

WRONG STOP LAH FUCK. THEY ALL AT KATONG SHOPPING CENTRE

My blood was boiling & urge to slap his cheek-bone outta his face.

Okay, so the singing session with Kenny, Fabian, Inging was great.

Ah hao & Boon didnt sing so don't care lah. LOL

This is Fabian Da ge.

anyway Kenny is still as cute as everrrrrr.

*********

I prefer to be alone. Don'tworry, I can move on without you

2007-06-17T23:06:00.000+08:00

Had breakfast with Ball.
Like finally I had my favourite hot cakes. & THANK you ball, you're sucha good companion.=D
Ocean's Thirteen SUCK, SUCK like wtf.

Met up with Brenda & BaoZhen
Brenda went for movie with her boyfriend.
then left me & baozhen shop,slack,crap.

went to meet Partner after that,
slack,ate,talks.

I'm so not in a good mood.
Many bad things are happening at the same time.

Carmen is not replying my msg, I'm worried-sick.

Ben, ... sigh
I don't know what I can do..
Everything I say, I do is like ALL WRONG?

All you know is give me attitude or f ing scold me.

.... sigh

2007-06-14T20:08:00.000+08:00

A bonus to my day,

Hello my girls & boys.

Thank you wild wild wet.

Thanks for the Sun burns too!

My girls

EH ING, dont copy me wear red stripes leh.LOL

Victoria & Jes

Carmen - Ling- Jes

ME! =D

The people =D

Saw this cute little monkey near the Downtown Mac,

I think it forgot it's way back to zoo or something.

Roy is disturbing me when I'm blogging this entry, HAHA

BYEBYE

2007-06-13T11:44:00.001+08:00

SO LIKE THIS IS MY ROOM's DOOR

This is to show someone,

I'm sorry for this very late post cus I know you wanted to see long ago. lol

*****

YES ARH,

Carmen, Lingie, Ing,Victoria, see you all tomorrow!

Wild wild wet here we come. LOL

******

Met up with Mister ball for movie,

FANTASTIC 4.

NICE lah! =D Cute right.

2007-06-13T09:02:00.000+08:00

She can do this, YEEE!

I went jogging in the early morning with VICTORIA,

I need to shed some pounds like SERIOUSLY.

Strenuous exertion causes Muscles ache aftermath but give me the sense of satisfaction,
I want to lose weight!

TUESDAY

Went Kbox with Mister Roy, that so-called Ball.
He is sucha Lazy-bones, we took bus from Hougang inter to Hougang don't know what lah.

Aiya, the main point is we could walk there like within 10mins please. LOL
ANYWAY, I had fun.
KEEP ROLLING BALL! =D
WHY YOU MOVE!?
NVM, my turn.AIYA, together lah. HAHAAHA

I love fuck face. Met up with my dear partner at 800+.

He recommended me one Hokkien mee, not bad.
& then ate the egg wrap rice thingy at corner, adsolutely mouth watering =D
I'm a BIG EATERRR.

However, I still felt a little bit of famish just not long after.
CAN YOU imagine how big is my stomach?

Partner was acting strangely in a way.
Well well, I'm a perceptive friend & I'm very aware of every of your movement okay.

SO like PARTNER, don't hide things from me =D

My partner.HAHA!

he says he's ugly in this picture lah.

MONDAY

Met up with Victoria girl, she broke down.
She cried in my embrace which pains me so much, heartaches nearly killed me man.

So like YES ARH, she finally broke up with Kelvin.
Don't mistake me, just that Kelvin had hurt her too much.
& I'd dare to say, I can give her more than him.
CHEERUP baby, you have ME! =D

We watched' Men in white'
F ing dumb show. PLEASE DONT WATCH.

You deserve someone better ... =)

2007-06-12T11:30:00.000+08:00

欣 - says:
when are you going to meet me again
亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
anytime.
亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
anywhere
亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
not anytime
亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
lol
亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
if i holiday!
亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
i will meet u until u get sick of me
亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
if i in school!
亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
i will skip lessons and go find u.

**

亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
i cannot take it liao 2 days nv see u

亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
very angry

亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
2 days = 48 hrs = 2880 mins = 2880 rounds around the clock ever since i've last seen u.

亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
so long
亿- with 52 days of lifeless to go... says:
zz
*****************

VICTORIA ♥ says:
so like i told you
VICTORIA ♥ says:
if you feel like crying ,

VICTORIA ♥ says:
call me

VICTORIA ♥ says:
no one will love you more than i do .
VICTORIA ♥ says:
really ..

VICTORIA ♥ says:
you mean the world to me , nothing can pull us apart . just like why the sky is blue , no one knows why ,
VICTORIA ♥ says:
just like i belong to you.

VICTORIA ♥ says:
iie lurbb eUu nehehes
VICTORIA ♥ says:
dunch worryy :)
VICTORIA ♥ says:
hahaxzx
欣- says:
iiee LuBbBx EuUu ToO WoOorx
欣- says:
WhArTtx EuU dOoiinq NeHhhx?
VICTORIA ♥ says:
iiex meetiinqq myee jess laterr 0n
VICTORIA ♥ says:
euuuU nehhxzx?
欣-says:
WTF!?! LOL

2007-06-11T14:02:00.000+08:00

Something to share, something from her.
Can you do this for me too? =D

2007-06-10T23:59:00.000+08:00

What come across your mind when this happens- you actually just took a chilling shower & yet after you put on your clothes, without much fidgeting your back is wet with sweat & ubiquitous droplets rolling down on your face - Global warming=.=

I cannot stand the scorching sun anymore,

nowadays, I was hoping that dark clouds would display at the azure sky.

Just a heavy downpour will do, like please lower the temperture of Singapore for maybe just a FEW freakin` days .

Okay, a day out with Miss bready-face Peining.

It's the first time ever I'd Q-up for things, or rather food for approximately 2 hours.

like 1 hour 30 minutes plus please. I almost broke my backbone & leg. lol

But anyway, I had fun dancing & singing while we're Q-ing. LOL

Hello, these are PEINING

She has that BREAD face, doesnt she? =D

Okay look at that 'shit' on her bag. LOL

Then finally. gone.

Okay, these are MEEE!

then, US!

Went 800+ & met up with Partner.

I was trying to placate my dear partner but I think I really suck in doing these kind of thing.

CHEERUP PLEASE. =(

2007-06-08T20:56:00.000+08:00

2007-06-08T20:36:00.000+08:00

It's always the same old jokes we shared with one another,

but I've never feel bored of her company.

She's my confidant, & I love her so much! =D

Girl, you made my day.

2007-06-08T10:09:00.000+08:00

YOU KNOW, it upsets me SO SO MUCH whenever I got rejected asking my friend out & they tell me, ' Cannot Leh, I pei-ing my Gf/Bf'

Okay I know I MUST at least understand.
But what irks me to the max is that majority of my (people in my heart) friends are attached.

So like, nevermind~
Still, I hope somebody would grasp what I'm trying to say.
I need a companion like so desperately.

& I haven't watch Pirates,
NOBODY gonna watch it with me cus I know EVERYONE watched it already.
I so feel like f ing my self upside down..

oh jesssssssssssss
you shit

2007-06-06T11:53:00.000+08:00

OKay I've just created one more Quiz ! Just scroll down , it's right below the previous Quiz =D DO OKAY. THe previous one is too easy man. =D

*****
I know I gotta admit that I still care for you much but look what you've done.
To you I'm like just another toy, play & throw it away.
Very late to say sorry, am not gonna forgive you this time.
I'm already torn.

I need to lost touch with you & forgets about you, really.
Otherwise, I'm so gonna die of heartaches so much.

no doubt I've been doing so much for you.
& look at your self please, do you think you deserve me?
Well, people say you don't.

Like uh-huh, I've no regrets because I've been putting all my best in this love.
You always ruin it all, I don't understand why?
I loved you so much.
Yet what the fuck you gave me.

I need a break, I need to save my self from all this trouble.
Oh come on, don't tell me you love seeing me cry.

I'm so heartbroken, sigh.

Old song, but I love it

2007-06-05T14:19:00.000+08:00

It's been like 123456789 days since I went out with Carmen Lee Jia Min, & yesterday like FINALLY! =D

Thanks to the ' Sunshine after the rain', the weather was just right!

.. spastic.

So like our nimble feet enable us to walk through the whole Bugis street like so many rounds.

Anyway in actual fact, we purposely walk pass a particular shop because my dear Carmen want to spot her Charming boy. lol

... She's so slim

Hey girl, the $2.50 pearl Milk tea you bought from that stall was really Thumbs up! ^^

Although it's like we can get $1 from else where, but worth it lah. NICE~!

Half of the day, Carmen & me was like mimic-(ing) the way we behaved during primary school.

like,'' I don't friend you already''

'' I bluff bluff friend you only.''

damn cute.lol

..., those were the halcyon memories.

The tranquil days when you don't have much things to worry about. awww.. MISS IT!

我不想，我不想，不想长大！HAHA!

I ate the 'Plaster' & 'Bomb' at night.

But wasn't FULL at all, not even a bit.

What a big stomach I have! =.=

Alright, Jess, you are too obese.

... & the day is so beautiful with you around